Gratefulness

Sometimes, I get bogged down and really truly forget to look at my life and just be grateful.  That thought hit me last week somewhere between Thursday and Friday.  


Things may be tough but tough things happen for a reason.  


Take example 1:  we moved to Keller at my insistence so that Joshua wouldn't have to be in three schools in three years.  Because of that, Oscar and I have gotten way more time with Ayva then what is ordered by the court.  He can see her any day he wants and with all of the impending changes coming, it is truly a blessing that he has had this year with her.  If not, all of the changes that may happen, would be happening right when we are moving to the area....  we would miss this whole year of extra close time without it.  


Which brings me to another thought (example 2)... when leaving Pennsylvania, Josh's dad didn't get very much warning.  Maybe a month at the most?!?  I can't remember...  We have more then six months to spend with Ayva.  Yes, the thought that she is leaving (or may be leaving) kills but at the same time, we have time with her and that's more then most people get...   so every day with her is special and I want to remember it and be thankful for all those small moments :).  


So while moving to Keller was a mistake and I was upping the timeline, there are blessings and silver linings in the grey clouds and even though I wish that I had done better and been a better wife to my husband, we would have lost so much.  Truthfully, I have been upset with myself and wishing I could change circumstances or things, so that we wouldn't be experiencing these problems but even if the circumstances changed would it truly be for the better?!?  


So while our outlook may not be the greates, being grateful has changed my total attitude of how I am trying to approach each day.  For everyday that I have with my husband I am truly blessed and grateful...even if it's not one of the greatest days.  At least I woke up with him beside me.